Chivalry: Another lost art?

[LostArt]

What do you think chivalry means today? Is it an ideal/act that is long gone? Do you think it is used much today? I'm curious to your thoughts guys.

I'd share my thoughts, but I truly want to get your honest opinions on what it means to you.

[Trampbag]

I’m not sure, but I don’t think I ever experienced any of it on a line crew, especially when building lines after work. Honest.


Welcome back.

[Koga]

Well maybe I just think different.I dont see it as a thing of the past and its not just a polite southern way of treating a lady. It to me is also giving to and receiving respect from others around you.Understanding whats important and worth standing up for and what aint going to amount to a hill of beans in 5 minutes.Not backing down from your beliefs or feelings about something just because the guys or majority goes the other way.The way you carry yourself .Knowing who you are and who the important people in your life are.No I am not the picture youll find in the dictionary, Im am a human being with plenty of faults.I hope I reconize them and work to change or control them and also accept others the way they are.Help when I can and mind my own buisness when it doesnt concern me. Yep to me its more than just holding the door or being polite.

Koga
PS
Welcome back LA!

["little beaver"]

What do you think chivalry means today? Is it an ideal/act that is long gone? Do you think it is used much today? I'm curious to your thoughts guys.

I'd share my thoughts, but I truly want to get your honest opinions on what it means to you.

Interesting point!! As koda says, it goes beyond 'opening a door for a woman'. There is still a 'vistage' of it maintained in the military. For example, if you enter the mess hall you remove head cover. If you enter the Officers Mess you remove head cover. Failure to do so results in buying a round for everyone present.

A few years ago I was invited into the Officers Mess of the Loyal Edmonton Regt. I had forgotten my wallet in my truck and I went out in the rain to get it. Guess what happened when I came back in? I forgot to remove my hat! The 'bell' was rung. Thankfully, old Col. Gregg was present and told the boys to show M___ some disgression.

I was in the Tire shop last week and I noticed that when two RCMP constables entered the building they removed their head cover.

Also in the Royal Canadian Legion, you always remove your hat upon entering or have to buy a round. That is in remembrance of our fallen comrades. I'm also a member of the American Legion (Green Mt. Post # 1). That tradition seems to have been droped in the AL.

As far as Chivalry/CLASS goes our British brethen have got us beat. I was in the UK two years ago attending a Military event and I was extremely impressed with their manners and politeness.

[LostArt]

WOW! Thanks guys! I like this feedback thanks!

Trampbag: Thanks for the welcome back. :) I just wanted to start a discussion and I "think" I started it in the right section on here! LOL! So, you don't think you are pretty brave or courageous working on a LIVE WIRE?? No? I do!!! Although there are many of you guys/gals out there, I don't think it's just for "anyone"!!! :D

Swamp: Well, I think that woman was rude buddy. There was nothing wrong with her saying "Thank you". That's my whole point! Where are the manners of just being courteous! I like the idea that women are equal, but I agree that it's kinda gone overboard in most areas. Good gravy. Now we "offend" those with politeness. Oh brother.

Koga and Lil'Beaver: I think you guys have the gist of what I'm thinking of. It's a form of conduct.

Here are just some words that are associated in the word Chivalry:

gallantry, honor, generosity, bravery and valor

I find most of the time that polite manners have just gone by the wayside. No one seems to use much common courtesy these days and I don't know where it all broke down at. It's almost like I woke up from a few years of sleep and most folks just decided not to bother with something that use to be as common as breathing.

In a lot of ways, I blame my generation, but now I'm not sure if it didn't happen before but is only more noticiable to me now. Maybe it's because I see the "breakdown" of the family as we use to know it.

[BigClive]

It's all about holding the door open for a dear old lady at the shopping mall, then slamming it just as she walks through while your mate films the results.

Hmm, no. Maybe I'm mixing that up with another word. :rolleyes:

["little beaver"]

"In a lot of ways, I blame my generation"

You're right LA(let's be honest about this), it's US!! It's the sixties/seventies generation. We were all part of it.

[LostArt]

Well, it most certainly is where I started wondering what the heck was going on "era". I think it was the first awakening of the media. Generations before had the radio, which was just the beginning.

As a young girl watching tv, I remember asking my father "Why this? How come that? What is the truth?" Generations before us depended on the newspaper/radio. But, as the world started being able to afford to get television, that is when it was thrown in our faces.....pretty much as it just happened.

It was alot to take in as a young girl who watches it into her teenage years. But, I will say that growing up with solid family ties helped. Now I can see in today's world how easy it is for young people that don't have strong family values ingrained in them might tend to test the world or go astray.

But, even though I heard the horrors or saw them on tv, I still wanted to believe that our soldiers were doing what they had to do. I've spoken to some vets and I'm still amazed at how they still believe in the ideal of America, even though Americans were spitting on them years ago. It still makes me tear to know that these noble and courageous men do what they are told to do (and what they had to do to survive) and we had the audacity to make them feel like dirt....worse than dirt. Untill they got to Vietnam, they believed we were fighting for something. They were doing what was expected of them.

**sighs** I'm getting off track...

I know not all men/women are good and that is everywhere and in every branch of service, in every job, in every classroom, in every church house and in every seat in congress. But somehow we have formed what I call today as the "it's all about ME, ME, ME" to hell with what anyone else thinks.

And now we have the "instant gratification" syndrome. "I want an answer now." You won't belive the parents that will call and expect a call back from our principal within a few minutes. When in years past, our parents never called the school, rarely checked us out, never even talked to any teacher except maybe by note, and let the discipline be handled by those that were in authority. I sure got an eye opener when I joined the education system over 15 yrs ago. My generation was either in prison or too damn sorry to take care of their children. I found my classmates parents raising their children.

What happened? What happened to basic fundalmentals that used to be used everyday? Where in the heck did we go wrong at? What is wrong with a few polite manners? And why aren't we teaching these simple actions to our children/grandchildren?

[Edge]

had to dig this thread up

If my sons or grandsons didn't open a door for a lady or someone elderly like Swimpy... I'd put my foot right square in their ass... it's more than just courtesy or chivalry it's more than being polite.... hell it's more than those that can SHOULD....

it's a bout getting off your ass and being part of the solution...

you either get it or you don't and if I can I will...

for what it's worth...

Edge

[electriklady]

In a world where a lot of the kids are rude and disrespectful these days, I had a very proud moment a few weeks ago....My 6 year old grandson and I were leaving a pharmacy and we had cashed out, then remembered I needed something else up near the door. My back was facing the door, when I heard my grandson's voice behind me, an elderly lady(older than his "gammy") was struggling with the door and my grandson(whom the door weighs more than) struggled and pulled it open for her, she then could not get the carts apart and Justin turned into "Hercules" and wrestled those carts apart for her and delivered it to her and said, with a big smile, "There ya go, mam.." She told me she had not met such a nice helpful young man in a very long time," and patted his head as we walked out the door. I praised his actions for 5 minutes, so he knew....that was the proper way for a young gentleman to act.:):D

[LostArt]

Holy cow batman....this thread is over 3 yrs old! :D

Why I started this, I'm not really sure. I do remember thinking it unusual for some young men to open doors for women or even the older generation. I always thank those that open the door for me. I guess I'm getting real close to the elderly group. So, in a lot of ways, I get a few surprises here and there.

Had one man walk through the front office doors ahead of me and not bother opening the door and going through before me---even though I spoke to him and walked with him down the hallway, only to find another young man behind me rush to open it for me. I said, "Thank you so much. You are a perfect gentleman." He smiled and even said welcome. The young man ahead of me turned looked at me, shrugged and looked to see if I was carrying or juggling anything. :D No, I wasn't, but the young man that was behind me, was brought up to do this.

Kind of refreshing. Since most young ladies today don't expect it at all and most young men....well, have learned not to bother. Sad, if you ask me. But, I'm old and OLD SKOOL. :D

[LostArt]

In a time that is lost, but then so is most things these days. And there is profiling-----we all do it. But, the simple fact is that there is no parenting, much less someone teaching proper manners.

When I first started in the school system as a substitute, I was amazed at how bad it was. The worst place to sub was junior high (middle school grades) and the next was high school (9-12). I said I'd never get use to working with students who had no respect for themselves much less for others or property. I also said I'd never work at the middle school (where I substituted) and I worked there for 10 yrs. I've grown to accept that this is just the way it is and yes....it will grow worse.

But, I still can not abide disrespect. I can almost overlook anything else, but that, even from parents. There is no call for rudeness.

Just recently, I had a parent ask when the dance would start on Homecoming night. Since I no longer work at the front desk, I didn't know there was a dance. So, I asked another staff member. And I told the parent following the game the dance would start.

Well, she said, "Tell me the exact time. Do you not know anything?" I then proceeded to tell her it was a "homecoming game" and it might run over some but my guess would be around 10pm to 10:30pm. She went on to say that she wanted the exact time and she wanted to talk to someone in administration. I told her that it was busy right now and we just had the parade and there was an office full of parents wanting to check their kids out of school. And at the moment, "I was administration" It didn't get any better and she wouldn't hush. Yes, I hung up on her.

I told the other office staff that was waiting on parents with me, if she called again (and I knew she would), to connect her to my office (away from the public) and I'd try talking to her.

She did call and my co-worker couldn't get a word in and put her on hold so we could finish waiting on the parents in front of us. When my co-worker picked it back up she tried to talk to her, but she couldn't get a word in and begged me to take the call.

When I get the call, she says, "Are you the idiot that I talked to earlier that can't give me the exact time and hung up on me?" And I said, "Yes ma'am. I'm the idiot." And she went into a rage---said she was coming down there and going to "deal" with me. :eek:

Our principal came in and my co-worker and I told him about the bellingerent parent. He said when she came in send her straight to him. After she came in and talked to our principal and left, he told my co-worker and I to type up a statement. Oh my. Then he had our resource officer serve her that evening. She was given a restraining order to not step foot on our campus until January 2010.

I don't think she expected that. But, when she said she would come up to our school and "deal" with a staff member (meaning me), I think that was considered a threat. And our principal told her she was being unreasonable, which set her off more. I don't know, but evidently our principal wasn't happy with her attitude.

AFTER THE FACT: The game went into over time and the dance didn't start until 10:45pm. And her female child was in the 6th grade. No child of mine ever went to a high school dance that young.

Also, she and her child are brand new entries in our district. Guess she got away with that kind of attitude at the other school she came from.

She was also a little bitty thing. I was teased that I was atleast 2 feet taller than her and could have easily took her on. No, I've never been in a cat fight and I wouldn't start at this time in my life. Buy my office staff sure gets a big kick out of it though!

[Meat]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q4880PJnO2E

[topgroove]

when I was a kid my parrents hammered into my scull manners. I worked in the resturant business through high school. Even though I was only a only an average student I always seamed to get above average grades. I would always hold doors open for teachers was respectfull and courteous and my friends thought I was the bigest kiss ass on the planet. I'm still the same way. Unfortunatly someone always seams to piss me off every once in awhile and I catch myself turning into Man bitch. Thank God I work alone.

[LostArt]

Meat, that didn't work for me buddy.


when I was a kid my parrents hammered into my scull manners. I worked in the resturant business through high school. Even though I was only a only an average student I always seamed to get above average grades. I would always hold doors open for teachers was respectfull and courteous and my friends thought I was the bigest kiss ass on the planet. I'm still the same way. Unfortunatly someone always seams to piss me off every once in awhile and I catch myself turning into Man bitch. Thank God I work alone.

LOL! I hear ya. :D Well, I'm away from the front desk these days so that helps alot. The older I get, I have to refrain myself from speaking my mind.