For my democrat friends....

[PA BEN]

New version
George and Laura Bush and Bill and Hillary Clinton are traveling by train to the Super Bowl. At the station George and Laura each buy a ticket and watch as Bill and Hillary buy just one ticket.

"How are the two of you going to travel on only one ticket?" asks George W, astonished at what he is seeing. "Watch and learn," answers Hillary.

They all board the train. George and Laura take their respective seats, but Bill and Hillary cram into a toilet together and close the door.
Shortly after the train has departed, the conductor comes around collecting tickets. He knocks on the toilet door and says, "Ticket, please." The door opens just a crack and a single arm emerges with a ticket in hand. The conductor takes it and moves on.

The Bushes see this happen! and agree it was quite a clever idea, so after the game they decide to try a similar plan on the return trip. When they get to the station they see the Clinton 'S at the window buying a single ticket for the return trip. To their astonishment, the Clinton 's see that the Bushes don't buy any ticket at all.

"Aren't you taking a terrible chance by traveling without a ticket?" says Hillary.

"Live and learn," answers Laura Bush. When they board the train the Bushes cram themselves into a toilet and the Clinton 'S cram into another toilet just down the way.

Shortly after the train leaves the station, George W. leaves their toilet and walks over to the Clinton 'S toilet, knocks on their door and says, "Ticket, please."

And Democrats are still wondering how they lost the election.

[LostArt]

Are you boys aggitatin' again? :D

Tell me Ben........Swamp..........who are you guys leaning towards voting for at this time? :cool:

[Stick-it]

http://z.about.com/d/politicalhumor/1/0/p/J/hillary_rudy.jpg

[Stick-it]

http://z.about.com/d/politicalhumor/1/0/-/d/1/hillary_bill_firstlady.jpg

[LostArt]

Have you heard about the newest addition to Webster's Dictionary?













Electile Dysfunction : the inability to become aroused over any of the choices for president put forth by either party in the 2008 election year.




Heh.

[wormy]

Democrat friends. From the way you act I am pretty sure you don't have any rep or dem friends:) Quit aggitating or I will start coming back at ya. After 8 years I am pretty6 sure I can come up with some cartoons:eek:

[Stick-it]

http://z.about.com/d/politicalhumor/1/0/R/q/1/pumpkin_carving_with_bush.jpg

[Stick-it]

Definately a right wing conspiracy
http://www.images.generallyawesome2.com/photos/funny/photos/donkey-pulling-cart.jpg

[PA BEN]

I was at the checkout of a K-Mart. The clerk rang up $46.64 charge. I gave her a fifty dollar bill. She gave me back $46.64. I gave the money back to her and told her that she had made a mistake in MY favor. She became indignant and informed me she was Educated and knew what she was doing, and returned the money again. I gave her the Money back .... same scenario! I departed the store with the $46.64.


They Walk Among Us and Many Work Retail
I walked into a Starbucks with a buy-one-get-one-free coupon for a Grande Latte. I handed it to the girl and she looked over at a little chalkboard that said "buy one-get one free." "They're already buy-one-get-one-free," she said, "so I guess they're both free".
She Handed me my free Lattes and I walked out the door.


They Walk Among Us!
One day I was walking down the beach with some Friends when one of them shouted, "Look at that dead bird!". Someone looked up at the sky and said, "Where"?


They Walk Among Us!
While looking at a house, my brother asked the real Estate agent which direction was north because, he explained, he didn't want the sun waking him up every morning. She asked, "Does the sun rise in the north?" When my brother explained that the sun rises in the East, and has for sometime, she shook her head and said, "Oh I don't keep up with all that stuff."


They Walk Among Us!!
I used to work in technical support for a 24/7 call center. One day I got a call from an individual who asked what hours the call center was open. I told him, "The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week." He responded, "Is that Eastern or Pacific time?" Wanting to end the call quickly, I said, "Uh, Pacific."


They Walk Among Us!
My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car designed to cut through a seat belt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the trunk.



They Walk Among Us!
My friends and I were on a beer run and noticed that the cases were discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought 2 cases. The cashier multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount.


They Walk Among Us!
I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area, so I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and I was in good hands. "Now," she asked me, Â"has your plane arrived yet?"


They Walk Among Us!
While working at a pizza parlor I observed a man Ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked Him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time before responding. "Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm hungry enough to eat 6 pieces."



They Walk Among Us, and they Reproduce, but Worst of all ............


THEY VOTE

[loner]

i was fueling my trouble rig one day and had to go inside to use my fuel card.the cashier ask me the truck number,my id number and then he just there looking at the computer.then he looks at me and says its asking for your o,do,meter,do you know what that is ?ah,yea its the thing that records your mileage.its pronounced odometer.

[PA BEN]

Am I the only one?
http://www.aspentimes.com/article/2008198091324#topofpage

I'll step up and say I'm one too!:mad:

[graybeard]

I'ld agree with everything in that article except I think the guys decribed would just call themselfs AMERICANS

[Dave@PSE&G]

I love this picture. I put it up before, but what the hell... :D

1230

[Dave@PSE&G]

1231

1232

[PA BEN]

I recently saw a bumper sticker that said, 'Thank me, I voted for
Clinton-Gore.' So, I sat down and reflected on that, and I am sending my
'Thank you' for what you have done, specifically:

1. Thank you for introducing us to Jennifer Flowers, Paula Jones, Monica
Lewinsky, Dolly Kyle Browning, Kathleen Willey, and Juanita Broderick.
Did I leave anyone out?

2. Thank you for teaching my 8 year old about oral sex. I had really
planned to wait until he was a little older to discuss it with him, but
&nb sp; now he knows more about it than I did as a senior in college.

3. Thank you for showing us that sexual harassment in the work place
(especially the White House) and on the job is OK, and all you have to
know is what the meaning of 'it' is. It really is great to know that
certain sexual acts are not sex, and one person may have sex while the
other one does NOT have sex.

4. Thank you for reintroducing the concept of impeachment to a new
generation and demonstrating that the ridiculous plot of the movie 'Wag
the Dog' could be plausible after all.

5. Thanks for making Jimmy Carter look competent, Gerald Ford look
graceful, Richard Nixon look honest, Lyndon Johnson look truthful, and
John Kennedy look mora l.

6. Thank you for the 73 House and Senate witnesses who have pled the 5th
Amendment and 17 witnesses who have fled the country to avoid testifying
about Democratic campaign fund raising.

7. Thank you, for the 19 charges, 8 convictions, and 4 imprisonment's
from the Whitewater 'mess' and the 55 criminal charges and 32 criminal
convictions (so far) in the other 'Clinton' scandals.

8. Thanks also for reducing our military by half, 'gutting' much of our
foreign policy, and flying all over the world on 'vacations'
carefully disguised as necessary trips.

9 Thank you, also, for 'finding' millions of dollars (I really didn't
need it in the first place, and I can't think of a more deserving group
& nbsp; of recipients for my hard-earned tax dollars) for all of your
globe-trotting. I understand you, the family and your cronies have
logged in more time aboard Air Force One than any other administration.

10. Now that you've left the White House, thanks for the 140 pardons of
convicted felons and indicted felons-in-exile. We will love to have them
rejoin society. (Not to mention the scores you pardoned while Governor
of Arkansas)

11. Thanks also for removing the White House silverware. I'm sure that
Laura Bush didn't like the pattern anyway. Also, enjoy the housewarming
gifts you've received fro m your 'friends.'

12. Thanks to you and your staff in the West Wing of the White House for
vand alizing and destroying government property on the way out. I also
appreciate removing all of that excess weight ( China , silverware,
linen, towels, ash trays, soap, pens, magnetic compass, flight manuals,
etc.) out of Air Force 1. The weight savings means burning less fuel,
thus less tax dollars spent on jet fuel. Thank you!

13. And finally, please ensure that Hillary enjoys the $8 million dollar
advance for her 'tell-all' book and you, Bill, the $10 million advance
for your memoirs. Who says crime doesn't pay!

14. The last and most important point - thank you for forcing Israel to
let Mohammed Atta go free. Terrorist pilot Mohammed Atta blew up a bus
in Israel in 1986. The Israelis captured, tried and imprisoned him. As
part of the Oslo agreement with the Palestinians in 1993, Israel had to
agree to release so-called 'political prisoners'.
However, the Israelis would not release any with blood on their hands.
The American President at the time, Bill Clinton, and his Secretary of
State, Warren Christopher, 'insisted' that all prisoners be released.
Thus Mohammed Atta was freed and eventually thanked the US by flying an
airplane into Tower One of the World Trade Center . This was reported by
many of the American TV networks at the time that the terrorists were
first identified. It was censored in the US from all later reports. Why
shouldn't Americans know the real truth?

What a guy!!



SINCERELY,
A US Citizen
PS.
Please pass along a special thank you to Al Gore for 'inventing' the
Internet, without which I would not be able to send this wonderful,
factual e-mail.

AND THE REST OF THE STORY Hillary Rodham Clinton, as a New York State Senator, now comes under the 'Congressional Retirement and Staffing Plan,' which means that even if she never gets reelected, she STILL
receives her Congressional salary until she dies. (Would it not be nice
if all Americans were pension eligible after only 4 years?)

If Bill outlives her, he then inherits HER salary until HE dies. He is
already getting h is Presidential salary until he dies. If Hillary
outlives Bill, she also gets HIS salary until she dies. Guess who pays
for that?

WE DO!

It's common knowledge that in order for her to establish NY residency,
they purchased a million dollar-plus house in upscale Chappaqua , New
York . Makes sense. They are entitled to Secret Service protection for
life. Still makes sense.

Here is where it becomes interesting. Their mortgage payments hover at
around $10,000 per month. BUT, an extra residence HAD to be built within
the acreage to house the Secret Service agents.

The Clinton s charge the Federal government $10,000 monthly rent for the
use of that extra residence, which is just about equal to their mortgage
payment. This means that we, the taxpayers, are paying the Clinton 's
salary, mortgage, transportation, safety and security, as well as the
salaries for their 12 man staff -- and, this is all perfectly legal!

When she runs for President, will you vote for her?

[PA BEN]

Jimmy Carter had a "Vision" too.:eek: This time the gas prices are starting out high:rolleyes: